The temples of Angkor were a lot to take in. They were the most amazing man-made sights that I have ever seen and after four days of such extraordinary mental and visual stimulation, Johanna and I wanted to relax. We had our eyes set on the white sandy beaches and turquoise waters of Cambodia’s southwestern coast, with a stop in the small city of Battambang along the way.
BATTAMBANG

Battambang is F.L.A.T.
Battambang is very similar to Phnom Penh in its riverside location and French colonial architecture, but it is only one tenth of its size. After checking into the Royal Hotel (for the royal price of $8/night) Johanna and I took a stroll and were surprised to find that we had walked the city corner-to corner in only an afternoon. We happened upon a small place called Cafe Flirt and joined Jonathan, the brutally sarcastic British owner of the establishment, and Jaime, a traveling Los Angeleno, for a few glasses of Angkor draft. As the sun set, we exchanged a few travel experiences and received some tips for our trip down to the coast. Jonathan highly recommended a journey to the isolated island of Koh Rong, claiming that the mainland beaches were becoming dirty, overdeveloped and extremely seedy. This was not the first time that we had heard this exact advice, so we knew it would be wise to take it to heart.
At some point, a lanky drunk Frenchman with a week-old beard and bags under his eyes crash-landed in the chair across from us and lit the first of many cigarettes.
“Oy, William!” Jonathan perked up. “Mate, where have you been the last week and a half?”
“I am sorry, my friend. I was working.”
“I dunno how you do it, man.” Jonathan turned to us and pointed across the table at his friend, who seemed to be doing a silent imitation of the Mad Hatter. “This one works as a graphic designer for shampoo or perfume labels or whatever, gets locked down at his computer in a dark room for weeks at a time and then THIS shows up at my cafe. Watch, he’ll hang around here for a few minutes and then he’ll go inside and make dollar bets on the pool table with my Kitchen staff.”
William found all of this hilarious and could not contain his laughter. We tried to get more of his back-story but it was difficult because he would begin a sentence and then immediately forget what he was trying to say. Eventually, he grew bored of us and went inside to start a game of cutthroat with the two Khmer bartenders. Why William chose Battambang of all places to telecommute to work, I’ll never understand.
The next day, Jo and I hired a Tuk-Tuk tour guide named Smey to show us some of the attractions around Battambang. As we left the city, we drove past the statue of the Stick King, Dambong. Legend has it, a simple farmer discovered a magic rosewood stick and used it to became the powerful King Dambong (Dambong is the Khmer word for “stick”). After a seven-year rule, the son of the previous king reclaimed the throne and Dambong threw the magic stick into the Sangkae River where it was never found. “Bat Dambong” (or “Battambang”) literally means “loss of stick”. The locals often leave offerings at the base of the statue, not so much for the spirit of King Dambong, but for the stick.

Battambang locals laying small offerings down at the base of the statue of King Dambong.
Our next stop was the famous Battambang Bamboo Train. The French built an extensive rail system in Cambodia during the colonial period, but much of it was destroyed during the Khmer Rouge. A decent amount of track still exists in Battambang Province and the Khmers have been using small engines and bamboo platforms to transport people and goods for decades. Now, sections of it are used as tourist attractions.
It was a beautiful day to whip through the local rice paddies, but our train sped through several swarms of gnats and other small bugs that stuck to my face and legs. Johanna and the locals thought it was hilarious.

Bug face.
After I wiped all of the insect guts off of my face, Smey took us to a small farming village by the river so that we could check out the orchards, gardens, and fields. Because it’s the wet season, most of the farmers were focusing on growing rice instead of herbs and vegetables.

A river-side farm.
Phnom Banan was next. Battambang Province is almost perfectly flat, with a few large hills/small mountains freckling the landscape. Buddhist temples, such as Phnom Banan, adorn the tops of most of the mountains in the area. A long narrow staircase led to the towers at the top.

Stairs leading to the top of Phnom Banan.
You can’t have a tourist attraction in Cambodia (or most places in Southeast Asia, for that matter) without groups of kids aggressively hawking snacks and useless trinkets, or just straight-up asking for money. At Phnom Banan, the kids followed us up every step to the top and fanned us with large traditional fans. I realized what was happening after a few steps, and told the young girl to please stop fanning me because I didn’t have any money to give her. It’s heartbreaking to see stuff like this, but it (sadly) becomes easy to ignore after visiting enough places.

Temples at the top of Phnom Banan.
After that, we headed to Phnom Sampeau. Smey accompanied us on the long walk to the top to visit the complex of temples there and to lead us to the Killing Caves where Khmer Rouge cadres killed an unknown number of victims of the revolution. An erie feeling overtook me as we descended a narrow trail and staircase from the top of the mountain to the mouth of the cave. The opening now has a tiled floor where a holy man sits during the day to collect offerings and say prayers near a large statue of Buddha. The space was dead silent and perfectly still – the only movement came from the smoke dancing off of the ends of sticks of incense.

The mouth of the Killing Cave.
Smey pointed up, guiding our eyes to a large opening in the ceiling of the cave about 35 feet above the floor. He explained that when prisoners were sentenced to death, they were led to the opening to be bludgeoned and hurled into the cave below. The bones and clothing of the dead were collected years ago and placed in displays at both ends of the cave. Just like the Cheung Ek Killing Fields in Phnom Penh, I thought this memorial was very well done. Both are deeply stirring homages to those whose lives were lost during the Khmer Rouge and both make for unforgettable visits.

The ceiling of the Killing Cave.
Later that night, Jo and I hopped on a bus and began our journey to Koh Rong Island. Two buses, one tuk-tuk taxi, one sprint along the docks, and a two-hour ferry ride later, we were in paradise.
KOH RONG
We probably would not have made the trip out to Koh Rong had we not heard about it from people like Jonathan in Battambang, our hostel owner in Siem Reap, and a bunch of other people along the way. Most guide books don’t include any information on Koh Rong and the Lonely Planet added a tiny section on the island just last year. But oh boy am I glad that we made it out there.
Koh Rong is approximately 10 miles long and 5 miles wide and lies West of Sihanoukville, Cambodia’s infamous beach city. On the South side of the island, there is a short pier that juts out of a 100 meter stretch of restaurants, bars, and guesthouses, with a few clusters of bungalows further down the beach. The rest of the island is pretty uninhabited except for a few small fishing villages. I believe the population of the island hovers around 150 people (including travelers like us).

Water buffalo in front of our bungalow with “town” in the background.

Walkway leading to the restaurant.
After checking out a few bungalows, Johanna and I decided to rest our heads at Monkey Island. Monkey’s consisted of a large open-air restaurant/bar surrounded by twenty or so thatch-roofed bungalows 100 meters down the beach from “town” where all of the restaurants and bars were. Close, but not too close.

Our beach bungalow.
We checked in, dropped our packs in our bungalow, and jumped in the ocean. After 18 hours of non-stop travel, that felt incredible.
When people ask us what we did on Koh Rong, we can’t really help but glance at each other and chuckle. We did almost nothing for 5 days…and then we asked Monkey Island to extend our stay. We spent a lot of time swimming, eating, playing cards in the bar, and lounging in hammocks. Hands down, the most relaxing place that I’ve ever been in my life.

Johanna doing what you’re supposed to do on Koh Rong.

One of the Koh Rong waterfalls.
We did go on a couple of short adventures while we were there, though. We explored some other beaches on the island, hiked through the jungle, and went on an afternoon fishing trip with a local fisherman named Davi. He showed us how to hold the line in our hands and wrench it up when we felt a fish below. We caught about a dozen fish in an hour using this method. Afterwards, he brought us back to his family’s restaurant and grilled the fish for us. No filet, no gutting, no oil, no salt or pepper, just super fresh fish thrown directly on a charcoal grill. Delicious.

Johanna fishing, Davi and his nameless assistant in the background.

Our fresh catch on Davi’s grill.
Some of the staff at Monkey Island were worried that Koh Rong would become the next Koh Phi Phi or Phuket (notorious party beach locations in Thailand). Apparently developers are purchasing quite a bit of land on the island and are planning on building resorts using more than just bamboo and palm leaves. It’s a shame, but a place as beautiful as Koh Rong can only exist under the radar for so long.

Leaving paradise. Not happy.